On Gonzo's lack of ability to sing or dance

[Gonzo] When my parents ordered me, they didn't order that accessory.

Birds and the Bees

So Elizabeth, who is two and half years old has a new brother. Elizabeth sees her brother’s penis and asks, “What’s that?”

[Elizabeth] Daddy, what’s that?
[Daddy] That’s a penis. Boys have penises and girls have vaginas.
[Elizabeth] Daddy, I like penises. A LOT.

Mother's Tough Love

Blanca to Gonzalo – Gonz was trying to explain his opinion about a certain movie.

[Blanca] Son, I love you, but you are dumb.

Email

[Dad] If I send an email from here, will it reach the Philippines?
[Margaret] No, it'll get stopped at the border.

destiny tea cafe

this is a fertile place for great, funny things said.

[context] christine is showing wiser her london/paris photos
[wiser] they don't look real... these are so good..
oh shit. that was a compliment.

[context] wiser is showing pictures of san fran
[beka] is that the Full House bridge?

[context] wiser showing his pictures of thailand/singapore - happening upon a picture of durian.
[wiser] it's disgusting. it tastes like garlic flavoured whisky.

[gonzo] where'd you make the baked potatoe?
[christine] in the oven...
[kathy] ...that's usually where you make a baked potatoe...

christine's cooking

[Dad] Hmmm... what food do we have here?
[Christine] There's my baked potatoe!
[Dad] What a waste.... of electricity.

margaret's amazing

"i hit my head in the face."

one of the nicest things my father has ever said to me:
"my dreams for you are coming true..."